Delicate Hands
posted on February 8th, 2010 (11:23 PM)
So I'm taking a soft pastel painting class at the local community college. Tonight was the first night. As I had expected, it was just older women (40-50 yrs old) and me. These ladies have all had experience with soft pastel before. I have had very little experience and was acting like a newb. Anyway, we were doing some exercises and as I was concentrating on the task at hand, making some really nice red and green color gradients. The instructor Shelly walked by and suddenly said, "Wow Yu, you're really good at making those gradients."
"Thanks," I said.
"And you've got really delicate hands. Look at how delicate his hand is..." Shelly said, to the other students.
The lady sitting beside me took a look and responded, "Oh yeah, those 'are' delicate."
Son of a bitch... I mean... come on. I've got calluses from years of workin out, at the gym! My hands are not delicate. Yes, I'll admit, I have very long and slender fingers that are extremly sexy, but I would not use "delicate" to describe them!
Bottom Line, I've got a real man's hands. Please refer to the picture below.
Note the two huge calluses below my middle finger and ring finger. I've circled them for ease of viewing. Calluses do not grow on delicate hands. They grow on a man who has had a rough and manly life. Case closed.
--------------------------
On a sidenote, these 'rough' hands of mine just finished the Koi drawing for my parents. Turned out pretty nice. Now I just have to buy a 9x12 frame.
My aunt is so bold. Told my buddy in AZ just now I would quit my job before Chinese New Years. I said it so now I have to do it. I'm a man of my word, baby. *phew, I have so much anxiety boiling within me right now. I know quitting my job is the right move for me. It's the uncertainty of the next step that is making me anxious. Quitting this job would push me towards that uncertainty, and that's what's getting to me. I guess the popular and most logical option is that I remain with this job and keep looking for other jobs... but you know what? I find it very difficult to do that. I need some impetus. Something real to force me into action. Unemployment will do that to a person. I've grown lazy and complacent. There's a negative cycle I'm trying to break here. It's a personal growth thing that I'm moving towards more than anything else. In the end, just gotta go with what I feel is right. I haven't done that enough in my life, leaving me feeling like I have never made any decisions in my life. That is the first real hurdle I've got to get over. Less thinking, more gut action. That's my Chinese New Years Resolution. Actually, it's been a ongoing battle. I've made a lot of headway in the past 6 months. It's not that I'm trying to not think at all, God knows I do enough of that. But it's because I think so much that it has become a hindrance to me, a major drag in my life. My mind has mostly negative things to say. I feel the need to go completely to the opposite direction, to break out of this lifelong pattern of nay saying and lack of self confidence. Then, when I'm out of the pattern, I will find the balance. I read this quote by some random person last week, "Remember to always make decisions with your heart and then let your head
head-handle the clean-up." You know what? The head does do a pretty good job at cleaning up messes, and the heart usually points you towards the place that it believes would make you happiest. I feel like there's more to write, but I don't know what else to write.
I'm just kidding head, let's be friends. I still need you. This year is going to be crazy year for me, and I'm looking forward to living it.
